One of the big lessons I learned about writing while writing my first book was the only way it was going to get done was to put the time and focus into it. I had to treat it like a regular job. So, that’s what I’m doing with the one I’m working on now. Like the first book, resistance to doing just that fights to take hold far too often. I refuse to let that happen this time.
At the end of June this past year, I asked a girlfriend of mine if she would try something with me. We’re both, individually, in the process of writing books and working on our businesses. I wanted to share just a little bit of accountability with her to help get me past my resistance to writing. I had heard her say something about her resistance and thought it could be a good match. She’s a healer too, so we talk the same language. I suggested a few rules, or agreements, I wanted to help make the experience enjoyable, without being a drudge in any way.
- The person writing would send a super brief email or text saying how much time they put into writing that day, i.e.: 2 hours writing today. Love, Maren
- The person doing the writing doesn’t have to contact the person on the days they don’t write or explain why they didn’t write.
- There is NO judgment, ONLY brief and supportive, encouragement from the person receiving the email if they chose to respond.
- The person receiving the email doesn’t have to respond unless they want to and/or feel guided to.
- If and when either party chooses not to continue for any reason, it’s agreed they do not need to give reasons to the receiver; they can just say they want to stop, without any negative repercussions.
I had read this brief, little book by Stephen Pressfield called, “The War of Art.” He’s a successful, well-known writer who puts in four hours a day writing. The book frankly discusses how resistance is the enemy to creativity, and how to overcome it. Based on having written before, four hours sounded reasonable to me.
My friend agreed to try this with me, and you wouldn’t believe how well it works. She told me it’s really helping her too; a win/win. I love those win/wins.
Even though there’s no pressure to respond, we both seem to always be guided to share a simple, “Yay for you,” or “I’m so proud of you and you’re commitment to writing.” You know, little things like that.
Many days, I’m lucky to get one or two hours in because of clients and life, and there are some days I just don’t have time. However, I find I’m far more apt to follow through writing, even a little something, knowing that support is there. Some days I can get even more than four hours in.
The past week, I’ve noticed a really wonderful behavior happening through me. There isn’t a thought behind it; it’s surfacing naturally. I’m finding myself using words of appreciation more frequently in my life. It doesn’t feel sappy. It feels good to share it.
I’m being careful so that my appreciation isn’t misinterpreted that I want something from them. It seems (sadly to say), many people are used to that kind of duplicity.
This year, I plan to continue to allow my appreciation for everything to expand, even those things I might label as being bad. I heard a saying recently, “We either get better or bitter.” I choose love vs. fear!…Well, if I forget, then, as soon as I can remember.
Remember and live your Passion.
Love And Appreciation, Maren
